I am a changed woman

Hindi ko alam kung paano ko sisimulan na isalaysay ang aking buhay. Napakaraming nangyari na ni minsan hindi ko man lang naisip na magaganap. August 6, 2011 na-invite ako ni Shane (college friend and classmate ko) sa isang concert sa church nila. Sa Starmall Shaw Blvd. daw and venue kaya go naman ako kasi malapit lang. Pagpasok ko sa trade hall iba yung naramdaman ko. Nag-sisigawan at nagpapalakpakan yung mga tao. Ibang saya yung nararamdaman ko. Di ko ma-explain, basta ibang saya. Weird!

First song: (The Anthem)

Hallelujah, You have won the victory
Hallelujah, You have won it all for me
Death could not hold You down

You are the risen king
Seated in majesty
You are the risen king

Naiiyak na ako na hindi ko alam. Grabe yung impact ng song though first time ko yun marinig. Nararamdaman ko yung mensahe ng awit.

May mga sumunod pang songs. Ang gaan ng pakiramdam ko. Pero dumating ang huling awitin na nagpaalala sa akin na may Isang nakakaalam ng lahat ng sakit na pinagdaraanan ko, galit, poot, problema, kahinaan, takot at lahat ng aking pagkakasala. Yung akala ko walang nagmamahal sa akin. Pakiramdam ko lugmuk na lugmok na yung buhay ko sa dami ng mga pagsubok. Eto yung awit na nagsilbing daan para durugin yung puso ko.

Who am I:

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth
Would care to know my name
Would care to feel my hurt?
Who am I, that the bright and morning star
Would choose to light the way
For my ever wondering heart?

Not because of who I am
But because of what You’ve done
Not because of what I’ve done
But because of who You are

I am a flower quickly fading
Here today and gone tomorrow
A wave tossed in the ocean
A vapor in the wind
Still You hear me when I’m calling
Lord You catch me when I’m falling
And You told me who I am
I am Yours, I am Yours

Who am I, that the eyes that see our sin
Would look on me with love
And watch me rise again?
Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea
Would call out through the rain
And calm the storm in me?

Whom shall I fear?
Whom shall I fear?
‘Cause I am Yours, I am Yours

A month ago before that concert, I was confined due to dengue, my boyfriend ended our almost 1year and 9months relationship, and then my 3 subjects in college have incomplete grades. I tried to end up my life because of those situations. Pero there was in my mind telling and echoing that my life has a purpose. Wala akong karapatan para tapusin yung buhay na hindi ko pagmamay-ari.

Lahat ng masasakit na pangyayari sa buhay ko simula nung nagka-isip ako ay naaalala ko habang inaawit yung “Who am I”. Yung lungkot, sakit at galit sa puso ko ay unti-unting napapalitan ng saya, kagaanan ng puso, liwanag at pag-ibig. I have no idea what exactly it was, yeah I do, it was the Holy Spirit! I felt this awesome presence. I repented my life, and devoted myself to Him.

One Sunday morning, I wake up and say Thank You for giving me just another day to live. Super gaan ng pakiramdam ko. Ang saya-saya ko! I am not afraid anymore of failing, or what people think. I know everyone sins, and we’re all only forgiven by the Blood. In the Bible it says, “Ask and ye shall receive…” No one is perfect, but now I have an assurance that even though there I may sin, I will be forgiven if I ask. I now have a goal that I am striving to reach everyday, and I know that I am weak and that I am going to fall but with Him I can pick myself up and keep going. For He is strong, and I can’t do it without Him!

Thank You to my Lord and personal Savior. His Name is Jesus Christ.

To God be the highest glory!

IMG_20130907_222441

Your sweetest Melody, ❤

Advertisements

One thought on “I am a changed woman

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s